I call this one "The Return".

This week has been a long and frustrating one. Ive tried seeing what it is that is making me so isolated from what im normally like.

I find burying myself in books has been helping lately. My ordinary ways of working, coming home,sleeping, all to do it over again, has changed. I know it will only be for a short time, but its made me realize that im not completely gone. Im still the same peppy girl, with a world of thoughts, sometimes that I become lost in.
This mind would be a waste if i didnt travel. If i didnt get on that plane, and the first time in my life, alone, and see something that nobody else in my bloodline has seen.It would also be a waste if I revolved my whole life around work. Sometimes its okay to plurge into the life of a dreamer.

It has crossed my mind that maybe, If I decided to stick with it, I could be an author. I never really considered it before, but with my mind always running wild, maybe its the best thing i can do with myself? I know I have an undieing love for music, but I dont think it stops there. I think I have a love for art, as a whole. for writing, for singing, for musical instruments, for painting. Im just one of those types of people who loves to get lost into creating art.


This is where my hostility towards this idea comes into play: Why do i keep changing my mind?

I want to do one thing, I want to do another.

I wish the world didnt revolve around one straight career for every person. In some ways, I like hearing about the Old World. Things were much more simple, mind you I dont much agree with how some things were handled. I think plenty of people can agree to that.

We have learned from our mistakes, but whos to say that we are doing it right, now?
Imagine all of the people who become a burden to themselves because they are lost in their jobs. All that becomes important is that paycheck. Your life becomes dull, each day rolls into the other, and you find yourself weary of your life.
Some are lucky enough to say that they love their job.
Most are struck with the thoughs, day and day again, that they want something more than the life that they are living.

Life becomes dull, when its the same thing over and over. I consider myself one of these people. I need adventure, I need to be on the tips of my toes, I need the adrenaline rush. Why?
I could ask whoever reads this the same thing. Why do you do what you do? Whatever makes you happy, whatever makes your heart beat. Why do you do it? Is it to feel complete?

For most people, it is. Thats why you hear of people you've never heard of before, With a New York Times bestseller. Thats why everyone has heard of Loenardo da Vinci. Indulging in something they truly love, something they truly appreciate. No matter what it is that someone has told them, judged them about, the artists seem to be like a needle in a haysack.. so hard to find, yet so amazing.

I am an Artist, And the World is my canvas.